Blog Revamping

Hello... I'm in the midst of revamping my blog to make my life a little easier. So do not be alarmed as work is still under construction.

Cheers,
Babe_KL
16 Oct 2012

Sunday, 15 June 2008

And I Thought I Would Have One of the Greatest Bake...

...later this year but it seems I've been unsuccessful indeed.

'Twas a harrowing week for us, I was 18 weeks pregnant but I was spotting and leaking liquid (definitely not urine) so I went to see my doctor on Monday morning. I was ordered to check into the hospital immediately for an emergency operation that very noon. I had a cervical circulage performed to hold my womb and ordered to be bed bound. I was told that the procedure need to be observed for the next 48 hours.

Darn!!! Hubby and I was all geared up to attend the Kylie Kwong dinner on Tuesday which hubby had won via the Astro contest! Sighhh so I asked him to go alone that evening instead after calling several friends who can't make it. Whilst hubby was checking with a friend if she can go with him, I experienced a gush a water leaked out. I frantically signalled for him and the nurse rushed in to check. Judging from her face and the midwife's, things doesn't look very rosy. We waited for doc to arrive.

Whilst waiting, since I've experienced a water bag burst scenario during giving birth to boiboi, I knew deeply inside that nothing can be done to save the baby. I grieved and prepared myself for the bad news to come but poor hubby, he was not. True enough, it seems that the fluid in my womb had already been infected.

I was sent to the delivery room by late afternoon. I was given drips to induce the fetus. Since doc said it will be like about a 2 hours thingy, I decided to be a heroine and did not opt for any pain killer. The contractions were frequent and was getting painful by the minutes. My mom and aunt came to the room to check on me. I knew they were pained from seeing me in that kinda condition. They were busy praying for a smooth and fast one. My boiboi was at my room thinking he can visit me but we disallowed him to come over to the delivery room. I don't want him to see me in that kinda trauma. I soooo missed him at that moment.

We sent the family back since we are not sure how long the wait will be. One of the midwives said there was one case few days back where the lady actually waited 2 days to deliver the fetus!!! OMG that really zonked me out... 2 blardy days? I can't be in pain for 2 days plus hubby's reiki wasn't so effective as the night wore on, so I ordered for the pethidine jab. Boy, am so glad. At least the pain was gone for 2 hours and I managed to rest whilst drifting in and out of drowsiness.

It was quite close to midnite when I started to feel some kinda contraction at my lower ab. I thought my pethidine is wearing out but somehow I wasn't just sure. I felt something is poking out down there. Got in the midwife and she checked... hurrah it's time.

The next thing I knew, the 2 midwives and a nurse on duty came in to help out. Later we found out we were the only case that night, hence full attention were given by the 3 of them. Doc is on the way. I think fetus was fully delivered by 11.53pm on 10 June 2008. Thank goodness it was nothing like giving birth to a full term baby. It was smooth and fast. Thank you Lord Buddha.

Doc came and managed to get the placenta out within the next 15-20 mins. It was all over...

I had a glance at the fetus and said bye bye in my heart before hubby pushed me down. Hubby spent some time reciting prayers and chanted Om Mani Padme Hum many times over to the fetus. He told me baby looked like boiboi and it was hard for him to have the image out until even the next couple of days. Yes yes, boiboi was going to have a little brother but boiboi told me don't worry, and ask me make another one for him after we broke him the news yesterday. He ordered me to make him a mei mei next time hehe... but that's another story.

I'm documenting this, well not to scare those who wants to conceive. I hope this is part of our closure in having tee tee with us for 18 weeks... all those initial fear, anxiety, joy, pain and hope. Well, I did not broke the news earlier about my pregnancy here since it wasn't an easy start after all. We're all coping well but it would be a lie if I were to say it's going to be easy for me, hubby, boiboi (I doubt he would have understand much about life and death but it's good to know there were some good questions from him) and the rest of the family. I guess time will heal us all unlike the previous occassion.

With this we bid tee tee farewell. May he be blessed with compassion, love and a brighter future.

Note: I thank in advance for all your well wishes for I may not be accessing the net on a daily basis. It's a pain to surf at my parents but I hope their streamyx line won't conk out whilst I'm there. I'm on semi confinement thingy at the moment, drinking in all those urrghhh hot soup with pepper/ginger/herbs. It's not a pleasant experience in this sweltering weather, oh please help! Can someone please perform rain dance or something on a daily basis for the next few weeks?

38 comments:

KK said...

It was hard to shed tears for all debated reasons. Having looked at him many times longer (coz I wanted to) didn't make the closure any easier. With him drifting to mind in all the quietness and the all the plans and hopes dashed, it's hard to hold back any longer. It stirred all my pent up emotions and shakes all hardiness of my male genes!

As a practising Buddhist, I'd like to look at this way: It's not time yet for us; it's his unfinished time to pop into this world! While he needs to "borrow" a place to do it, we need to strengthen our characters by design! Our only wish, May he be born in Tushita Heaven where Buddhadharma flourishes; May he have the merit of a great life ahead; May he have a safe journey to the next!

FooDcrazEE said...

may u be blessed . My wifey and I had gone thru similar thingy 3 times. Until Alpheus was born. Then it came again with Esther being premature at 950gm. . . . .

Be strong . . . . . . . mei mei will come to you and ur hubby.

Rest for now . . .prayers for you and family

backstreetgluttons said...

thats soooooooooo sad, but never mind ...sometimes it happens to the best of us

YozoraNiteSky said...

my heart reaches out to you, my eyes tears for you. i know words of comfort will not console you... only time can heal this wound. i just want you to know that should you need anything, all you have to do is ask. friends always.

bublesbonny said...

It happen to me twice. I was so happy to be pregnant again after waiting for 3 long years. But it ended on 30/5/2008. I m going for my last try. I m sure the GOD have better plan for me and you ahead. You take care ok.

ling239 said...

dun care weather hot or wat lar
must take care, rest well and eat all the food that will help u recover soon please ~ ^_^



oh, sorry... me dunno rain dance wor >.<"

ipohwav3 said...

I'm sorry to hear about your loss, Babe. Worry about other stuff later on, you need to get more rest and recover fast, ok? *hugs

Tracy Tan said...

so sorry for your loss...take care and get well.

Desparil said...

sorry about your loss. hope you get well soon.

on a side note, it rained heavily in kl today. somebody's prayer was answered, i guess.

her said...

get well soon. n be strong k!

Mor Mor Bunny said...

I am really sorry for your family and own loss...do take care of yourself, nourish yourself and rest enough so that you will be blessed with another baby soon.

KAY said...

Sorry to hear about this.
Be strong and get well soon.

MamaBoK said...

*hugs*.. you take good care..!

dcyk said...

i'm very very sorry to hear of your loss babe jie, get well soon.

Nishantha said...

Don’t leave your strength. This can be abnormal but this will be normal next time. Doctor will help you to get well soon. I say again “Don’t mentally down”.
............
Nishantha
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utterlycynical said...

Hugs Hugs...

Tummythoz said...

U are definitely one incredibly strong woman/mother/wife!

Lemme sing a song. Usually will bring plenty of thunderstorms.

Little Corner of Mine said...

So sorry to read about your loss. Please take good care of yourself and get well soon. It tears me up to read what you and your hubby had went through, you both stay strong okay. *Big hug*

babe_kl said...

dear all, i'm deeply touched with all your comments esp those whom commented the first time. it's comforting to know there are so many caring people around me. we're both holding on well and i'm fine and dandy. thank you all for your kind thoughts and well wishes.

tummythoz, can sing louder arhh??? just now drizzle a bit only wor hehehe or can you people go wash your cars?? lol cos my dad washed his on monday and it poured. ahhh bliss!

SulynQ said...

babe jie...so sorry to hear about your loss. Take care and get well soon.

MeiyeN said...

am so sorry to hear bout your lost! i shed my tears reading this but you are definitely one strong mommy... no worries, da time will come and you gonna have more babies in da future! *hugz*

J2Kfm said...

babe, though we do not know each other, but I'm a keen follower of your blog.
do take care, and rest a lot.
time will heal the wounds.

twosuperheroes said...

Babe...we're so sorry to hear about what happened. We pray that you, your hubby and even your boiboi will be strong. We know nothing will replace your lost child, but please recuperate well and rest more.. Hope to see you well again. :)

valisaiskandar said...

Babe,
*BIG HUGS* I am soo sorry I responded too late. I just manage to get to your blog. Will follow up with mail - take your time to heal physically, mentally, emotionally... for your soul just eat lots and LOTS of choocies.
I will perform rainy dance everyday for you at my back garden - it has been rainign a lot these past few days ;-)
*hugs* and good karma,
Lisa

Jessie said...

My tears just rolled down before I could come to the final part. I can feel your pain. Be strong, Sweetie.

JeromeFo 令狐冲 said...

Om Mani Padme Hum~
Om Mani Padme Hum~
Om Mani Padme Hum~

Guanyin will always protects you.
Stay happy =)

rokh said...

i am really sorry to read the news. i am also amazed by your strength! take care

New Kid on the Blog said...

I am sorry to read about your loss. I truly understand how you feel.

I myself have gone thru your previous experience. What comes now is something precious to us.

I know you're a strong woman, and you could take care of yourself. God will always be with you.

Flower said...

So sorry to hear about it. I know how you feel becoz I've gone tru the same things. It's hard but somehow we learn to live with it. God will bless you.

Florence said...

Sorry to hear about your loss.
Take good care of yourself.
*Hug Hug*

Precious Pea said...

Babe, I am so sorry to learn of what happened. I hope you are feeling much better now.

babe_kl said...

thank you all for the caring thots. glad to say i'm feeling better now. should be cancelling my MC for next week and get back to work. i'm feeling restless staying at home

lionfish said...

Hi babekl... stumbled upon your blog entry... So sorry for your loss... Stay strong and god bless...

Precious Moments said...

Sorry to hear this and hope you are feeling stronger.

I am sure boiboi will have a mei mei soon.

In the meantime, plenty of tonic to nourish the womb. My sister nearly lost my niece if not for a good sinseh my mom insist she visits.

Have you in my prayer.

Take care

InnerJourney said...

just chanced on yr blog. Om Mani Padme Hung and may Tee Tee be in Dewachen

babe_kl said...

thanks lionfish and precious moments

inner journey, thanks. its so comforting esp it's so near to the supposedly "give birth" period.

Jade said...

Sorry to hear this, i hope you are feeling better now. Take care.

jadepearl said...

Hugs! Hugs! Hugs!
I am soooooo sorry!
Apologies also for this very late post. So many things had happened to me too.
I know how you feel as I had a MC for my #1 too. Be strong and rest, rest and rest.
Take care!